being a pessimist is great i’m always either right or pleasantly surprised
#the optimistic look on pessimism
(Source: xcyst, via ujhsfuv)
get used to being alone
you’ll be alone your whole life.
— 生活 (life)
(Source: aemei, via alienasss)
boy, blowjobs sure are a mouthful
jeez, that pun was hard for me to swallow
thanks for your contribution
when my dad was in college he had a friend who told a girl he’d take her on a date unlike any other she’d ever been on and so he took her to the supermarket to watch the lobsters fighting in the lobster tank
they’re married now
Ah yes, tumblr shall never fail me, I go from seeing an adorable dog letting himself into a police car to anal prolapse. Never change tumblr.